Men of the Year 2014

David Oyelowo

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You may or may not recognise the name, but you will sure as hell recognise the man. Mr Oyelowo has been in some of the biggest films of the last five years – The Help, Rise of the Planet of the Apes, and Lincoln to name just three – and this year was no different. With roles in Interstellar and A Most Violent Year, David’s career seems to be getting bigger and better, culminating in a brilliant performance as Martin Luther King Jr. in the highly recommended Selma. As our very own Sarah put it, he’s come a long way since Spooks.

Chris Pratt

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Whether he’s Fat Pratt or Six Pack Pratt, we’re smitten with the Parks and Recreation star – his turn as Star-Lord in Guardians Of The Galaxy has seen him go from (please excuse this next word) cuddly, cute comedy actor to bonafide box-office banger. And before you say it, no it’s not *just* his looks that have us hooked – Pratt’s hilarious performance as Emmet in The Lego Movie appealed to viewers of all ages and his voice was perfect for the earnest and enthusiastic hero. And good lord was it difficult to make a decision on which picture of him to use for this post. I spent HOURS researching…

John Boyega

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Since the end of November, there’s only one film anyone has been talking about, and it doesn’t even come out for another year – Star Wars VII: The Force Awakens. The trailer opens with a young man popping up on screen looking panicked and exhausted – that’s our John Boy(ega)! With a lead role in arguably the most hotly anticipated film of next year, we’re so impressed that the star of Attack The Block and Half of A Yellow Sun has seen so much success so early on in his career – and he’s still only 22 years old!

John Oliver

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When Jon Stewart took a break from hosting The Daily Show this summer to direct his film Rosewater, he could have picked any of the show’s correspondents to stand in for him, and he chose the only British one. John Oliver did a fantastic job of hosting the show; he was already hugely popular with the audience, you could tell this from the rapturous applause he received whenever he hosted a segment. His brand of super-sarcastic, verbose humour was wasted on the absolutely dire Mock The Week, and he’s much better suited and appreciated in his role as a correspondent on a fake news show. Sure, he looks like a Jim Henson muppet come to life, but he actually did such a good job that he was given his own show on HBO, Last Week Tonight with John Oliver, which is similar to The Daily Show but with even more sarcasm and a British accent – what more could you want? And speaking of The Daily Show alumni…

Stephen Colbert

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This year, Stephen Colbert was announced as David Letterman’s replacement for when the talk-show king steps down in 2015. While the DTSFT ladies agree that it would be nice to see someone other than a white, middle-aged man hosting a late-night chat show, we’re still pretty pleased with the choice that’s been made. Stephen has come a long way since his days as a correspondent on The Daily Show, landing his own show in 2005, The Colbert Report, which sadly came to an end in December with a final episode packed full of callbacks to earlier episodes and a sing-along with his favourite recurring characters and guests. It’s going to be weird to see him hosting as himself rather than the conservative character (also named Stephen Colbert) that he has played for so long, but we’re definitely excited to see what he has to offer.

 Kailash Satyarthi

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Along with Malala Yousafzai, Kailash was the recipient of the 2014 Nobel Prize for his tireless campaigning for children’s rights. The access to education, which we in the Western world take for granted, has been a focus point for Mr Satyarthi, and his Nobel Prize was well-deserved.

Peter Capaldi

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Here at DTSFT, we were delighted with the casting of Peter Capaldi as The Twelfth Doctor, as he made a nice change from the potato-faced Matt Smith. His turn as Mr Curry in Paddington also brought him to the attention of a new and younger audience, who will hopefully be tuning in to be utterly terrified by Doctor Who.  Mwuhahahaha!

Chris Evans, Sebastian Stan, and Anthony Mackie

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Yeah I’m lumping them all in together because otherwise this post will go on forever – it’s the Captain America: The Winter Soldier gang! With Hannah’s insatiable lust for Sebastian Stan, there was no way the DTSFT ladies were going to leave this trio off the Men of The Year list. While we’ll have to wait for Captain America: Civil War to see the boys back onscreen together, you could check out ‘Playing It Cool’ for a cheeky helping of Evans and Mackie. We’re especially proud of Evans for his directorial debut, Before We Go, as well as his role in the dark action thriller, Snowpiercer – give it a UK release date, god DAMMIT!

Chadwick Boseman

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Chadwick made waves last year with his role as Jackie Robinson in the magnificent 42, and it looks like the next few years are going to be no different for this versatile actor. After portraying soul legend James Brown in the biopic Get On Up, Boseman is set to star as the Marvel character Black Panther in not one but TWO upcoming Marvel movies – Captain America: Civil War and Black Panther. Chadwick, you complete and utter BANGER.

Jack O’Connell

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Unlike some actors who seem to love the limelight more than the craft, Jack O’Connell is a young actor who has worked hard at his talent and is finally starting to get some recognition. After making his name with a role in Skins and films like Private Peaceful and Harry Brown, this intense young actor’s star has continued to rise and this year saw him in three of the most talked about films – ’71, 300: Rise of an Empire, and Angelina Jolie-directed Unbroken. From interviews I’ve watched, he doesn’t seem all too comfortable on the chat-show circuit, which I think makes for a better actor – the less we know about him, the more believable he’ll be in his roles.

He Could Get It…Lee Pace

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WHY? We’ve had the delightfully ghoulish with the excellent series of HCGIs for Halloweek (The Gentlemen being my personal favourite), but now its back to perving over more heavenly creatures.

I have seen Lee Pace in the flesh. Not close up sadly but we were in the same room breathing the same air and so we’re technically married. He really knows how to sit on a chair, you guys. He sat the hell out of that chair.

He’s like a real life Disney prince but with a personality and minus the horse-drawn carriage. And at 6′ 3 Lee’s height game is on lock, so he can do cool stuff like…like reach top shelves and…and bend slightly when he walks in your room. Yeah, that stuff.

I’ll be seeing The Desolation of Smaug mostly for him, now. If you’re going to kneel to one formidable, otherworldly king this year, forget Loki – make it Thranduil and his insane swordplay.

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He Could Get It Horror Series… The Gentlemen

Ignore the grammatical issues from that title – I’m not going to mess with our standard titles.

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WHY? Firstly, their name. The Gentlemen. Who doesn’t bemoan the lack of chivalry? Well these guys are named after men of courteous conduct. Secondly, they’re always smiling. Cheerfulness can be underrated. Plus, white teeth are overrated. These guys have got silver. Silver trumps white. Thirdly, their silent. No awkward conversation. You can rest happy in silence.

Also, look how polite they are too each other, let alone a girlfriend/boyfriend/significant other.

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He Could Get It Horror Series… Leatherface

Known to carry big things if you know what I mean – and by ‘big things’ I mean a chainsaw; check this power tool-wielding son of a bitch out, seen here with his big-ass mallet.

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Let’s face it, ladies, everyone likes a complicated guy. We think we can change them, so if you’re looking for a project, LF is your man.  Tall, dark, and unusual looking, he’s a family oriented man who had had the benefit of a southern upbringing – we’re talking traditional family values, okay?  But while he’s a traditional guy, he’s also kind of kinky – never seen without one of his masks, I think we can all agree that this guy is a role-playing fiend.

He’s quiet and shy, and protective of his possessions – but ladies, that could mean you.  He’s the kind of guy who’ll defend your honour if he sees someone else encroaching on his property; don’t be surprised if he chases away competitors with a chainsaw.  Haha, oh Facey, you so jealous.

He Could Get It Horror Series…Dracula

You can keep your Twilight and your Vampire Diaries.  Here at DTSFT, there’s only one fanged finey we want sucking on our necks…

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You see that popped collar and that baller pose? Your man ain’t got shit on Dracula, son.  You could spend your life wishing you were as dope as this suave motherfucker, but you’d never come close.  His pet hates are religious zealots and French food, and his idea of the perfect night out ends in him getting some quality time with your jugular – and ladies, he doesn’t glitter in the sunlight. No man has ever looked this good in a cape, and with his slicked back hair and intense, frightening stare, I think you’ll find it hard to resist his charms.

He Could Get It Horror Series… Jack Nicholson

Yeah ladies, we’re taking it back to the 1970s for this one.  I mean, he’s not the ropiest old 76 year old git, but let’s face it – I’m talking about One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest era Nicholson.  Lean, spikey-haired Nicholson, with packet of fags in his sleeve and that smile, that god damn winning smile.

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Oh 1970s Jack, with your dinky nose and lean physique, you were a fine specimen, yes you were.  And let’s not be so superficial to overlook the man’s acting chops; in terms of the theme we’re going with this week, Nicholson is no stranger to scary roles – we’re talking about a man who sent chills down our spines as the psychotic Joker, simultaneously made us fear and pity him as Jack Torrance in The Shining, and made us want to sin as Satan himself in The Witches of Eastwick.  You sure get around, Jacky.  And he hasn’t lost his touch with the ladies…

He Could Get It Halloween Series… Ryan Reynolds

Oh Canada!  Our home and native BAM Ryan Reynolds all up in your face

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Reynolds makes it into our Halloween series of HCGI posts because of his roles in Blade Trinity and The Amityville Horror; both were terrible films in my opinion but let’s be honest, he took one hell of a beating in Blade Trinity and chopped the shit out of those logs in Amityville.

He has more abs than you’ve had hot dinners, because he doesn’t eat hot dinners presumably – just raw steaks and eggs between sit-ups and planks.  And yeah he’s made some shitty films in his time, but I think he’s getting it together finally. But if he doesn’t, it won’t going to stop me from looking at his fine ass whenever he’s on the big screen.