I certainly hope you all got your coats sorted out from last week’s post. I know that I misunderstood the question and only realised it too late, but you can’t say my advice wasn’t sound. Anyhoo, it’s time for this week’s question, which comes from Henry C in Hollywood (hey, I happen to be in love with a certain Henry C from Hollywood, how strange is that?), who writes:
“I want to confess my feelings to the woman I love. We have never met, and yet I know she is perfect for me, and so I want to give her a gift that would show her how wonderful and special she is. What gift do you suggest for a London-based aspiring writer who is so brilliant and smart and funny and beautiful and amazing and perfect?”
It’s a very valid question, Henry C, and I’m glad that you asked me for help in finding a gift for this anonymous yet familiar-sounding woman. You could go for some book vouchers, because if she’s as wonderful and smart as you say she is, then she’d surely appreciate some of those. Or chocolate – I mean, chocolate can never be a bad thing. What about some lovely jewellery? I reckon she likes big clunky cartoonish stuff, like the items you get in Galibardy. Don’t ask how I know th-
Oh Henry, who are we kidding? I know you mean me, and I accept your undying love and return it.
You are the only gift I need. Together, we’ll be unstoppable.