DTSFT Men’s Column #11 – One Night Stand

 Unfortunately in life, you can’t change people, and what’s even more unfortunate is that people, in general, are terrible.  But if some day you smack your head really hard and suddenly decide that the best course of action would be to spend a prolonged amount of time with another human being, then that’s your own business, not mine.  Which brings me to this week’s question, which comes from Billy in Chester:

“I pulled this bird last night when I was out at a bar, using your techniques on how to approach women, cheers for that. Anyway, got her back to mine, put the moves on her and next thing you know, it’s morning.  Had a blinding night with her, but I don’t know what to do next – is she gonna get all clingy or is she gonna be able to accept that it’s just a one night stand?”


Oh, Billy.  There are so many things that I need to say.

Never assume that a woman is going to get clingy – all you’re doing is assuming that you are something so special that they NEED to have you in their life.  You’re wrong – if they went home with you, it’s just because they wanted you at that moment, and if this woman happens to have ever eaten a bar of chocolate in her life, then she’ll know all about the regret of a brief and meaningless encounter, which I’m 99% positive is the reaction she had to her dalliance with you.  Sure, there are going to be women who want more than a one night stand, and likewise there’ll be men who want more than that, but if you’re the one with these worries at the start, I reckon you’ve either got an unsubstantiated ego or hang-ups of your own.

And the more important part of my answer is this: No-one gives a fuck about your life.  Ever.  I need you to remember this.  If you’ve had a chance encounter like this – and I’m addressing all you readers now, too – I cannot stress how little of a damn people give.  No-one ever has cared (nor will they ever care) about the superficial things in your life.  Put it this way – if this one night stand doesn’t matter to you, why in the hell do you think it will matter to anyone else?  It just won’t. My advice would be to continue living your life as you have been up to this point but with one change – shut the hell up about your life and go about your existence as if you are surrounded by a sound-proof bubble.  No-one cares.



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